姷瑾

ok ~ tomoro i gonna have my introduction to information tecnology final exam but i still writing blog at here !!! how genius am  ! Am i crazy ? the reason i writing tis blog is i just finish reading a blog ~lol~ not  lol at all ~ am i crazy ? the way u treat me it still not cruel enough ? but why i still can telling myself to forgive u ~ and still hoping u will happy and get the right person in the future ? i think i really crazy , or i too kind 4 tat , i really blessing with my true heart ~ really ~ cause i really want u to be happy boy ~ maybe i should just call u man ~ i wasting my time reading his blog ............from the end till the starting ........ don't tell me u wanna block me again if u found out i read it ? i think u will , maybe ,tat the attitude u treat me ? and i donno y i read it ~ it just like reading a story book ~ hmm........... actually tis few day i think  a lot ~ i not mature enough ~ so be happy in ur future ~ tat wat i can say , d...

time just like flying and making joke with me ~ it had come to end of the sem again ~ when i close my eye , coming back from The Mines is just like just happen yesterday ~ such a sweet memory ~spending all the time with all my lovely tkd gangs ~ 4 this sem ~ hmmm........... happy , sad and angry , that we go through together ...... uncounted ~ snowflake ~ friendship ~ the things that always make our journey interesting ~ love ~ the sweetest thing but it also the things that make us suffer ~ family ~ 4 me only , giving me a warm hug but too noisy ~ looking back ~ wat had i done 4 tis whole sem ? damn idoit ~ spending money , playing , movie ,haha~ but most of the time , when the sem start ,i crying ~ wat had i learn from u ? yup ~ i learn how to cry , i learn wat is the feeling when u really love a person ~ don't talk about the sad things ~ most of the time , we go lepak together at times square and sungai wang ~ we go watch so many movie , like THE THING, ...

how long had i come to this college ? hmm ...... half year ~ tat mean tat i had know u almost half year ~ i had like u for half years ............. the time past so fast without our knowing ........ i trust myself and trust u , although so many things tat i see and hear from other , wheather bad or good ... i donno y , but i just follow wat my heart and mind say , trust no matter wat happen ....... wat people say , how they scold , how u hurt me , but i still belive , 1 day u may change , although i may not the 1 who let u change , although i not the type of girl u like , but i still waiting miracle to happen , although i noe it won't..... but since when , i start to doubt u , should i continue to trust , is not a good things to hear but should i ? cause i lost my confidence , i lost it , boy , sorry , i don't mean it ~  u may not mind the trust on me to u , but i mind on it , i donno y, i wanna care u , i wanna continue to like u but i lost the confidence , i not d...

sorry ~ since when tis word has coming out from me recently ? the reason i saying sorry , my friend that care 4 me always , i not tough enough to leave out everything yet ~ i still miss that stupid , i still feel uncomfortable when i lose connection wiyh him , i feel insecure when i didn't find out that he is safe .................. sorry , i deactive my account sudden just because he want me to dissappear from his life ....... cause i too mind what he saying , what ever the word he say to me is always in my mind ..... as conclusion , it not nice to say it out but the thing is i still stop myself from stalking him........... is a habit or wat ? i donno ~ if it really a habit i hape i can lose it ...... sometimes the world look perfect from outside but it started to be bad from deep ............ i deactive my account yesterday , the reason is i keep remember the word ........ step out from my life ..... the second time it let me feel like is such difficult to be a good f...

where should i start ? hmmm............ ok........... since i try to let down all the things ...... since i lost my tears to cry for you ....... since i lost a best friend like you........ i donno what the reason that make this happen between us but it can't turn back.... i had regret and apologize 4 so many time but it useless.... and wat the point i continue to do it when i found out that you didn't even care and treasure ..... the memory, i hope i had a delete button beside my mind so i can't straight delete it from my mind ..... i try to be strong , i try to do the best ...... i try to live without you...... i try to stop my tears.... and i did it ..... no tears for you , since last 3 weeks.... stop to miss you or care for you is the only things that i can't stop myself doing .... although it become lesser and lesser  , maybe once a week but you still feel that it is annoying ,k i will stop it ............. i care you as a friend , is thst a dif...

F lash back ~ half year ago ~ hahaha~ the 1st sight ~ The 1st time i step into the room , the 1st person tat i see is you ~ with a big eye ~ the moment i start to noe wat is fall in love with the 1st sight~ The second tat can let me cry ~ yea ~ u r the person ~ my tears become cheaper because of you ~ it come out so easy without control ~ what will you feel and think if you noe i learn how to cry since i love you ~ hahahahaha~ i damn stupid ~ The 1st peson tat let me feel wanna take care him for the whole of my life ~ the feeling that let me hug him tight and telling him i always right behind you is always in my heart ~ hope to hold you help you when you are in trouble , eventhough as a friend ~ is this love or just my feeling ? am i loving u from my true heart ? can anybody tell me wat is tis ? can anybody tell me can i continue doing like tis although i donno wat is tis ? maybe ..maybe ~

After 300 years and 1 month  ......................== finally i update my blog again ~ between tis 1 month , CK ? tell the truth , how many times u had cry ? donno ~ almost twice a week ~ hahaha~ FCUK my life 4 loving you ~ i didn't hate you but just can't accept the truth tat happen between both of us ~ when our friendship start to change this situation ? how many times i had tell you i demand nothing , just a friend ~ my favourite song for emo, just be friend and kiss the rain , i had repeat them for so many times in the middle of the night... my friend saw me crying , she say nothing , just hug me tightly ~ i ask her , should i just let our friendship just continue like tis ? should i continue loving him ? should i wait him ? althogh just half year , i had fall in love deep on him ........ she say  , i donno , depend on u~ 4 myself , i really donno ... i had lost the reason tat continue loving you ........... do i have the chance ? no ...... yesterday...

看着你，很多故事...... 坐在你前面，看着你说着你喜爱的事物，你闪闪发亮的眼睛，深深的吸引着我，那么迷人，那么让我迷恋，有多少个晚上，我是想着他入眠...... 你伤心，你沮丧.....你着你哭诉，说着你对她的爱，有些无法释怀，但始终听着，听得我心碎，心疼.......心疼您的眼泪，为何为那种人而留下，是如此的不值得。不是说男儿的泪，不能轻易的留下吗？你为什么为她而流............ 有天我说错话了，你生气的样子，真的令我害怕，你不理我是的孤单，的失落....... 在你身边，我不想错过你任何的情绪，喜，怒，哀，乐..... 但我很自然的是希望你每一天都那么快乐，看着你天真的笑容，我心暖暖的...... 好喜欢你，也许你不知道，有多少次，看着你心是酸酸的..... 虽然我们不可能，但我始终会祝福你，找个对的人在一起，要很快乐，很快乐....

i donno where to start but it is the end ~ he is the love that i can't hold , and u r the story that i can't end ~ i love you ~ that always the truth ~ damn ~ i don't deserve the love , ur worry and everything ~ everybody asking the reason ? what good about him ~why u love him ? no reason ~ if i like a person there a reason ~ but 4 love no~ maybe u can't understand what i wanted  to say~ but the word tat i can't say is also sorry ~ i just a annoying girl ~ act like ur gf ~ but i didn't ~ i just treat u like my friend ~ i treat everybody same ~ something the thing is not need to be act ~ it comes from a true heart ~ but look like u can't understand ~so , sorry~ i didn't even had the right to treat you good ~ go find a girl tat have a right to treat u good ~ i damn selfish ~ if u keep staying beside me , i can't stand it ~ cause i don't want only friend ~ i demand more than tat ~ who noe ~ i had miss the love somny times ~ and at ...

Yesterday after cleaning my room in hostel i had go to wangsa maju Jusco~ Go there just wanna buy soap only ~ but at the end ~ i bought a ice cream from Mcd~ =w= i walk back to bus stop ~ the weather didn't look good this few day after i came back to KL~ i take Rapid back to go back hostel~when i go up i saw a malay women~( not a ghost story )== at the begining i didn't think sit beside her but the seat tat i wanna sit is dirty~so i just sit beside her~ the story begin here ~i had a short conservation with her~ is just a short world but it let me think a lot~ she saw i hoding the rapid card~ she say ~ i just lost mine ~in the bus when i went to chow kit last time~ She having a look that let me though that she is same age as my grandma~ i ask ~ how it happen~sorry 4 tat~ she say~ ya la~ very cheep if i use tat card~ just RM 1 where ever i go~ i : oic~i am student so cheep a bit ~ RM 1 also if i go chow kit~ She ~ i go chow kit need RM1.90~ i~ wa ~ so expensive~ S...

this is a short blog ~ that talking about wat i do  and wat happen to me tis to day~ 11 of sep~ Starting morning ~ a raining day~ i sleep till damn late ~ 11am i woke up~ after breakfast i go to take my bath ~ prepare 4 movie~ nasi lemak 2.0 XDD my aunt  invited me and my both  sis ~ she belanja three of us 4 movie, pokcorn and bread~ we watch it at MBO~ and my favourite bread shop ~PATISFRANCE ~ i go there  it bread almost everyday while i work there ~ i miss the bread so much >< after movie we just go home~ Beside my house got pasar malam ~i miss the char kuew tiao badly ~ but i didn't eat ~ After my shop close , i just sit in front my com watching movie ~ 杜拉拉升职记～nice movie ~ i like the man inside ~ it talk about a woman work hard in her company and become a CEO of that company within 5 year~ but she felt difficult when she fall in love with her boss ~ they still get together at the end~ After the movie i wanna be like ta...

ok~ its been for some times i didn't update my blog~ err~reason ~lazy and no idea ~haha~ today the reason i update my post is i just get some idea after i finish BBQ with my family~ so long i didn't spend my time with them ~ i love u all ^^ waiting~ this is my 1st sem break 2rd week d~ the 1st week i spend my time with all my taekwondo gang and buddy at THE MINES resort at Belakong~ 1st trip since i had went to TARC to study ~ i don't had the chance to join trip when i still in secondary school cause they always cancel the trip when i decide to join~ tis call wat ~ shui ~ deng~ on wan xuan car ^^ Ben and Caesar is a memorable trip 4 me~ 1st time i cook 4 all my friends~ i love to cook 4 my friends ~ is my dream and it come true~ so happy ~ seeing them eating the food i cook ~the feeling is so nice ~XDD we go there to play water sport and BBQ and we even play like crazy person till midnight 3 am XDD is so excited~ i love it ~XD many couple ...

it is a promise~ and this is the last time i turn back to talk about my past~ about my past~ it always make me hate myself~ seeing myself ~ so stupid ~ so lonely~ am i too proud or think a lot than other that having same age with me~ i too careful and walking so fast ~ cause i hate and scare to be hurt ~ and because of too fast ~ i lost the happiness that i should had for my passing age ~ my bro tell me although u loss somethings in the pass but i gain something now and future ~ ya~ just like wat he say i gain something~ i know the world more than other ~ i know what the real world look like~i got more expirence than other~ is not easy to be hurt in the future if u know a lot and think a lot~ face the world ~ face the truth~ this is how i live~ since the new journey start~ i wanna be a better girl ~ slow down my step~ enjoy everything i should have in the collage life~ may be i should think about boys ~ haha~ but not now ~ get a close buddy ~ ya i got a lot now~ study ...

Ok ~ now ~ no i should say ~~~~yes !!!!! finally , finally i finish my 1st sem exam ~ no eco ~ yes ~ i gonna enjoy my time with sleeping , books, drama in this few days~ for 3 weeks ~ i had let myself suffer for cold in library~ i scare cold ~ it make me feel lonely~ i hate to be alone ~ but i don have the choice ~ i don have the right to get my true love~ i donno y ~ i keep telling myself ~ u r just my friend~ but deep in my heart~ i so suffer~ seeing u and her ~ but wat to do~ i prefer to be silient ~ i don want to talk so much ~ so hurt~ so deep~ i tried to control myself from being near with u but it just can't ~ i will be very emotional after seeing somethings tat may have related with u~ i tried to be good attitude to u ~ but i fail to do~ i'm the one who start the quarrel again~ i don want it to happen but it just happen~ i just can't control myself from being angry when i noe u r hurting urself and wat the girl do~ i won't scold the girl ...

ok~ today i had go through the last two paper ~ marketing ~ is quiet a sad thing for me cause i had memorize all the things and the things that come out just half only but...........TT i stil hope can past la~ tomoro~ ok kitchen ~ i try my best to copy and paste all the things into my brain ~ i don wanna fail !!!! u noe ~ 1st time ~ 1st time i study so hard cause exam ~ i noe myself well i don like to study but i had force myself to go library to study 4 3 weeks start from 8.45am till evening !!! arghhh !!! now i'm so tired ~ i don feel to be the best but i wanna try my best~ and about my personal life....hmm.... almost the same makan and study~ but after exam i wanna enjoy !!!!!! sing k~ puchong trip~ movie~ !!! the conclusion~ i will try my best today ~~ study all the things~ it is not a love ~ it just a habit~ is just normal when u beside me~ as a friend~ i treat u just like friend and i love u cause u are my friend but not lover~ till now i just ...

This week exam d ~ ok ~ talking about exam~hmmm..... since when i become so hard working XDD i almost go library 4 study everyday > ya i love myself to be like ta tat means tat i had change to be better person XDD but the things b4 i start study ==||| i pokai liao== wat is pokai ? no money la~~ y ? ok ~ almost everyday i go eat dinner outside hostel ~ that not a main point~ the main point is where i go ~ ya ~ I go mamak , i go restaurant ~ i go western restaurant!!!! i feel to hang myself~ after tat i go pizza , i go mcd , i go sing k !!!!!! hahahaha!! tis is y i pokai XDD no funny == my last hundred ringgit ~ i gave out for Puchong trip d~ T___T but 4 all the monry i spend and the things i do ~ no regret ~ and i enjoy 4 tat~ spending all my time with all my tkd gangs ~ nice ~ tis is the things tat i never expirence b4 when i in secondary school~ sad ~ i donno y all the girls in my secondary school always don't like to call me out~ and they always go by themself ~...

8 of August ,i skip my marketing class 4 lecture cause teman some 1 emo and gonna study 4 exam ~ but the thing after i came back i play FB ~ i feel sorry 4 myself == i go 4 the HE lecture and i regret with my attendance == tourism + hotel management= 400++ students but just 1/10 0f students in the hall == after tat i go 4 the economic tutorial, b4 going i went back to hostel to change cause emo guy Eric call us to sport complex 4 gym ~ another regret attendance 4 me ~ when i reached the class, i shock with a empty class== i feel to jump down from the3rd floor of M block ~ 5pm i go gym to meet them~ but i get message from Chew Ling Eric had a replacement class and he will reach 6++~ wat happen to me T口T but nvr mind , we go in 1st b4 he come~ BenBen and his classmate joining us ~ i go cycle 4 20 min and walk + run 4 30 min~ i think tis is the 1st time i burn so many calories ~== after gym ~it look like going to rain ~ Wan Xuan join us 4 dinner~ we decide go GK 4 pizza ~...

7 of August ~ today i wake up at 11.00am and start writing my blog~down 1 la not now 1~ sit in front of my com i just study half of my introduction~ poor thing> but i still study ~ after 3pm i go lepak a while at Wangsa maju jusco~ when i in melaka , i also love to lepak but the things is i always lepak alone ~ i don't like lepak with all my girls because many things that i can't do when i lepak with them~ suffer u know ~~ i go wangsa to top up my phone credit and i go jj to walk a while and i bought a cup of coolblog ~ my favorite~ oreo peppermint milk tea~ i love milk tea so much >M i go by metro~and also came back with metro~actually i wanna get Rapid but the Rapid didn't come after i waited 4 half an hour == i hate u~ after i come back i straight open facebook~my habit~ and i found out somethings different about Eric ~he is so silent today~ if 1 day he didn't post many things that tell u tat somethings happen~ i not know him well but i still know his habit~ ya...

don't know why ? this few month i started to write my blog in english~ maybe i just wanna improve my english and get some attention from my friends~ not sure about tat~ talking about my blog i really hope to get some atttention from my friends , not all but some of my close friends ~ but the things that i dislike is after some of them read my blog they will laugh and talk about my blog ~ they will say i'm stupid == hey !! this is my blog if u wanna continue to read please shut up your stupid mouth b4 i stuck something inside~ This few day i having a bad mood and keep emoing == maybe some personal problem and some irritating person ~ talking about the person ~ arghhh ! i feel to bite her ! can u understand how irritating if the phone that u keep answer is call by a same person~ this problem strated when i gave her my number ~ i regret with tat == she keep calling me and call me and the reason she calling me always make me to hang up myself ~ ok ,not only her who wanna make me ha...

这星期 也许是我人生中 度过最长的一个星期 我的故事 你的故事 朋友 知己 我们似乎被夹在中间 爱你 也许让我变傻了 但我却有了目标 不再盲目 我愿意一辈子单身 也要守护着你 你的心 比我脆弱 爱 也许不能相比 但我不会输 我好喜欢你

我跟他 选择了对彼此坦白 我不知道我做得对不对 但起码 我们还是好朋友 我不知道 自己有多喜欢这男人 但我已包容他所有的缺点 也许是太了解 他宁愿不要我爱他 也不要我被他伤害 对他 也许就只能这样了 他可以同时喜欢两个人 我也认了 也许是注定 我也认了 如果能以朋友的身份 呆在他身边 要我单身一辈子 我愿意 你可以说我傻 但 你有想过吗？ 他是我的全部 在我生命里 他是不能少的角色 我好喜欢他

最近真的很纠结 才发现自己搞清楚了一件事 我原原本本喜欢的人 根本只有一个人 太清楚 每天都提他 每天都想他 但我很明白 我不应该喜欢他 不是因为他属于她的 而是他...... 无言 为什么我喜欢他 如果需要理由就不叫喜欢了吧 我只知道 在他面前 我可以很任性的做我自己 我可以做个真正的我 完全没伪装 呆在他身边我很舒服 可以很自由的骂粗话 他也不会介意 我和他是同一种人 我很明白 我太天真 我太了解他 他追过的每个女生 个个条件都比我好 我凭什么开口说我喜欢他 也许能以朋友的方式 就这样受在他身边 就够了 我不想破坏 我和他现在之间的友情 也许这感觉只能永远的 藏在心里 但无所谓 你幸福 你开心 我看见 什么都好 我会祝福 因为我喜欢你 我不想把这份珍贵的感觉 变成了别人的笑柄 甚至让你受到不必要的伤害 所以 我只想永远的 偷偷暗恋你

Sometimes i find out that , although the accident change my life , but i still happy , i treasure with what i had now .... the world that after the accident make me change, maybe is better to be. I love all my friend, not only in KL, also Melaka . eighteen, so wonderful, i enjoy my first movie in KL, go times square together, play around, go mamak stall with all my seniors XDD u know what ? i didn't did this before when i was in Melaka !! Sometimes i though i know well about Melaka, but now i'm wrong, i know nothing, it is useless if u know everything nice without ur friends. boys and girls , u all are so important to me, so , don't ever leave me alone, cause i love u all ^^

如果人生能像我们想象中那么简单， 也许我不需担心那么多， 担心自己那么不小心， 不小心喜欢上不该喜欢的人.... 有时明明知道自己想太多， 但却还是情不自禁地掉了下去。 but i still know how the world look like, so i prefer to like you silently , i know it will be so suffer , but i like you.... sorry, but don't worry , i will always behind you when you turn around . i will  help you when you are in trouble, always be. true friend to be. saranghe

不知忘了多久 等你上线 变成习惯 看你部落客 我会对着电脑 傻笑 我想 也许忘了你 真的很难 我爱你 始终那么痛苦 你对我的恨意 始终不会消 你开心 我只能 偷偷的 替你高兴 因为我知道 我没资格介入 你的生活 你就像彩虹 好漂亮 却碰不到 我只能远远观望 黑夜里 我摸索 你就像光 牵引着我 却是到达不了的尽头

不知不觉， 我的学院生活已过了漫长的两个月。 说长不长， 说短不短。 时间就是那么奇怪。 这漫长的两个月， 我过得很好， 但心里总在挣扎。 挣扎什么？ 我总在问我自己， 秋静啊秋静～ 你到底有选对科吗？ 经过这两个月的尝试以努力后， 我决定继续下去。 为什么？ 我看到学长学姐们时， 我会想， 他们读的东西都比我难， 他们也能撑到今天， 那我呢？ 如果我放弃了， 不是很没用～ 所以现在的我在继续为我美好的未来奋斗着。 至于跆拳道嘛～～ 我已经是green senior啦XDDD 多一个月我就能考上蓝带了XDD 我要努力练好我的pattern还有kicking~ 还有好多好多东西跟我的senior们学呢～> 我的感情世界呢？？ 哈哈哈哈～ 我这花心的～ 每天都坐在学校里， 手是拿着书啦， 眼睛却在看帅哥XDD 喜欢的对象？？ 有是有啦～ 但他那么优秀～ 我等八辈子吧>~~ 但说真的我真的蛮喜欢他的XDD 他是我学长， 但他好可爱啊～> 也很man勒～ 六块腹肌的嘞！！ 喷>血

完全没预知 我们安然度过了一个月 我没见你 快一年了 不 是你没见我 也许我已经没像从前那样 那么的喜欢你了 那份热诚 那份温度 已经跌入了低温 还没到零点 但已开始结冰 冰不是在零度冻结的 我还是热爱跆拳道 你也一样吧 也许这是我们唯一的共同点 我已是个学院生 我希望你跟我一样 未来 我希望能看到你在某所看到你毕业 那也是我其中一个心愿 也许我还是有个习惯 习惯看着你上线 却不跟你说话 习惯看着你下线 却来不及说晚安 你过得好吗？ 你还爱她吗？ 我们还是朋友吧？ 应该够了吧...

在吉隆坡的日子快一个月了～ 但我相信想我的人会很少==（擦泪） 在这里，我已经开始适应， 认识了很多朋友， 开始参加了这里的跆拳道^^ 在这里我很快乐， 不是因为自由了， 而是有机会让自己长大～ 我今年十八岁了， 这是一个在我人生中， 给我很大改变的岁数， 从一个完全不需为自己的生活担心的人， 变成了什么都必须承担的人， 父亲车祸， 生意变差， 顾客一个接一个的离开， 那种感受， 我觉得很少跟我同年的女生会理解的心情， 我背负的不只是自己与父母的期望， 而是整个家族， 身为陈家的第四代长孙， 可不是闹着玩的。 所以我总是很努力。 至于感情， 算了， 没有就没有， 小女不敢多求， 就像我手相说的， 我今生注定无情， 只希望， 生活能顺利的过下去.......... 天啊～ 重看了一遍， 我到底写了什么东东== 希望看得懂～

不知不觉我上学院的日子到了第三个星期啦~ 一切都很顺利~ 就不知为什么花钱还是画得好凶> 搞得我好穷 囧 上个星期有人盖了我的线~ 我觉得他完蛋了~ 这星期很多tutorial都开始了~ 功课没我想象的多~ 都还听得懂~ 今天去佩秋家游泳~ 好久没游了~ 结果太兴奋搞到脚抽筋>0 我把头发染回黑色了~ 我们今天也在佩秋娜玩化妆品~ 其实是为了我拍照的妆~ 化出来效果不错~ 明天有training~

我来吉隆坡一星期啦~ 有人向我吗？ 我想没有~== 我在这里一切都很顺利~ 只是闷了点，谁叫我没电脑~ 很不例外的，我还是好想念江直树~> 我在这也认识了新朋友~ 虽然很少，但都是可以交心的朋友~ 但防人之心还是不可无的~~ 放些照片~ 想我的话打电话给我吧~ 但我先声明~我宿舍常没线~>

不知不觉我在吉隆坡三天了~ 很想念马六甲的朋友> 即将在这里展开新生活了~ 好紧张~ 担心自己糊涂，犯错，迟到> 宿舍小小的，明天开始会过去住那里~ 我猜我还没饿死就被闷死了== 朋友，想我了可以来看看我~ 我宿舍的号码是三条一==

如果能把生活中的如果都实现， 那该多好..... 但都说是如果， 怎么可能呢？ 哈哈？ 如果你爱我， 如果我向你表白， 如果我回去的话， 如果没有你的话.... 习惯用如果来判断生活的每个细节了.. 我与你的回忆， 全都是用我的如果去创造的， 你能说我大胆， 但其实我是只想去试试， 也许成功的机率是存在的... 就这样而已。

时间过得好快~ 过多两个星期吧~ 我就要去读书了~ 好舍不得~ 其实一直有件心事都未了~ 但都毕业了，就算了吧~ 我不是美女，那种心愿不可能实现~ 从考完试到现在~ 我没出过门~>, 好想再去读书前，跟阿馨，阿琦，还有其他朋友出去~ 但很难吧~ 短短几个月，发生了好多事~ 爸爸至今都还没出院~ 还被某人从FB上给删了~ 算了~ 只希望阿爸快点好~ 我只想问他~ 你过得好吗？ 我走了之后，你会怎样？ 也许我没权力过问~ 但我会想你的~

just fall in love ~

我最近… 靠啦！我很闷耶！ 没看戏！没电脑用！ 我真的不知道要做什么！ 除了送货，玩电话，运动，就没东西做了~ 成绩快点出啊！ 我要去读书！！

最近真的好闲啊~ 爸从医院回来了~ 某位顾客也闹别扭，不要跟我们那货了~（欠打） 为了不让自己无聊，我就每天拿着电话，在那里玩我新游戏~ The Sims~ 我好像上瘾了== 最近都在追《泡沫之夏》~ 才发现自己是看黄晓明的戏长大的~ 从《还珠格格》到《神雕侠侣》~ 他变了好多> 从不出名的配角变成了中国的一哥> 身为他的影迷，我好光荣> 看《泡沫之夏》我心里好多感言~（擦泪） 看着洛熙，欧辰还有夏沫的故事~ 心里不是滋味~ 虽然已经把他的书看完~ 但我觉得看戏让我的心情起伏更大~ 其实看书时我没酱讨厌欧辰的~ 但看戏后我觉得他好无理~ 虽然戏和书改变了好多~ 但我还是喜欢~

花开花落… 我何时会变成哪掉落的花…

今日终于有天休假了 觉得好闲决定下Dp一趟~ 记得我最后一次下那里是十一月的事了~（擦泪) 把煤气送完后，冲个澡，就出发啦~ 十二点九酱到那里，直接去找Ow~ 去的时候遇到Miki的爸~ 去到Ow那里一直都在讲话~（话多) 讲了好久~ 之后去逛… 我在想，会遇到你吗？ 但之后想了想，别傻了，遇到又怎样… 买了几本漫画和挂电话的吊饰品才回家… 前几天是我的生日…没庆祝… 有买个蛋糕… 没吹就切了… 我真的没什么愿望…

今天一如既往去医院~ 八点酱~ 遇到一个保安~（不顺眼） 然后他让我很不爽~ 他不给我进≈≈ 好采他不像上次那个看门狗~ 不然~（他会直接被推进去） 最近我又看回《原来是美男》~（太无聊了) 根硕越看月帅>

今天一如往常~ 我跟阿妈到工厂去送货~ 平时会有工人出来帮我们杠上去~（工厂食堂在三四楼酱） 但今天.....我被他气死了~ 今天其中一档的工人已经下来，还剩两档的~（食堂里有三个档） 我跟阿妈就等咯~ 等了半小时他们还没下来~ 妈说她等不住了叫我等，她先上去收钱~ 又过了半小时~（我生菇了） 他还没下来，然而我的头发已经被风吹到乱完了~（那里风大） 妈下来了~ 她就在那里骂~ 原来那三个工人都不在，不知道去哪里wed了~ 最后我们把货丢在guard house叫他们自己下来拿~ 谁还要等他啊！！ 我最近开始做闲职啦~ 就做纸皮的那种~ 就一个丙图，然后我们就拆了装纸袋~ 工钱很低的~我在家做爽爽~ 一个一分~ 一百个就一块~ 打发时间罢了~

去了一趟KL~ 为了去拉曼的开放日~ 我和妹坐了五点的巴士~ 好久没上去了，好兴奋~ 到那里快八点了~ 昨天刚好初一，阿姨就带我们去吃斋~ 去到阿姨家，我大展歌喉，哈哈哈哈！！！(被巴) 家敏很开心（我表妹） 家阳躲在楼上看戏，家伟补习~ 家敏的姑姑也有过来~（他旧家在隔壁） 她就看着我们唱歌，好羞涩>/// 我们跟阿姨唱歌唱到十二点酱~ 第二天^^ 阿姨带我们到她家附近吃点心> 很好吃，好吃到烫到嘴巴都脱皮了~ 之后我们去拉曼了~ 拉曼位于Setapak，去哪里要半小时酱~ 拉曼的校园范围好大~ 我们只去他礼堂== 现实与理想总是有如此大的差别~ 本来想读传媒的我只好放弃了~ 不得已~ 经过调查，传媒在本地的发展真的很不广~ 朋友们，谢谢你们的努力与支持~ 也许我辜负了你们，但我决定拿酒店管理了~（擦泪） 起码改天我努力工作，赚大钱了，我请你么吃大餐啊~（任叫） 之后我去了Mid Valley~ 这是我第二次去~（可悲） 阿姨请我们去吃Kenny Roaster~ 这也是第二次吃~（我的第一次是在我还不懂事时） 全部阿姨付费~（羞涩） 为了谢谢阿姨，我只好请她喝coffe bean~（小杯的，我很穷） 之后我们就回阿姨家拿行李~ 如果你有机会的话，你一定要去吉隆坡的新巴士站~ 那里超大的，是缩小版的飞机场酱~（靠！马六甲飞机场都比它小耶！！！） 我们买了六点的车票~ 回家啦~ 看完别打我啊！！！>

不知道为什么 跟他和好后都好开心 是因为太喜欢它吗？ 我不知道 看到他我真的会发傻 我觉得我是爱他的 比根硕更爱 他最近的头发长了 他它把他绑了起来 哈哈 怪怪的 但不管他变成怎样 我还会喜欢他吧 >/// 他不知道没关系 只要他幸福^^

今天在MSN上面遇到了变态 他跟我露那个！！ 阿！！！ 幸好我没叫出声， 我真的先把他杀了 有了男朋友总是比较好的 有时候真的很无奈 好爱你却不能告诉你 需要你时 真的不知道怎样开口

有多少次我重在问我自己 该不该爱你..... 之后我发现我爱你 我没后悔 我不需要跟你在一起 不需要表白 看着你我觉得够了 你快乐 我也快乐 你幸福我也幸福 你教会我的东西好多 所以 有没有在一起不重要 我不会在我爱你的日子 加上期限 我只能说 如果我在 我对你的爱总是存在 不会改 一生一世 说得有点不切实际 所以 我不会说我爱你一生一世 我会说 我总是爱着你^^

如果一开始不认识你就好了 如果我不爱上你，会是怎样的结果.... 如果有一天，我说我不爱你了，你会怎样？ 如果你有了女朋友，我是否会心疼？ 如果没那人的存在，我们是否还是好朋友？ 太多如果 如何说出口....

昨天我跟妈吵架了，就因为不理解彼此要的是什么… 我休息的定义跟我母亲休息的定义不一样所以吵了起来。 我的定义:上网，睡觉，玩耍~ 妈的定义:看书，睡觉~ 你看，能不吵吗？ 最近大家都好奇Spm的成绩几时出，我也一样…希望我的成绩能让我进到拉曼学院>

愁 愁什么 愁你不喜欢我 愁你讨厌我 愁要怎样让你原谅我 愁日子怎样过 好多东西要愁

这几天晚上我都必须呆在医院来照顾爸~所以有几天的时间不能上网~无奈~ 我爸床隔壁有个年轻人~不瞒你说他是最糟糕的人~他爸好可怜~他简直是个懒虫！我爸住院快一个星期了~他就在那里躺了一星期！OMG！他连手拿一下，脚拿一下都喊痛！kanasai！然后哦，他连上厕所都不要下床！靠！ 不知道哪个拜六得空，想跟妈请个假出去玩…

拍拍翅膀 等它生毛 然后呢 挣扎 咬断所有铁链 变长了妖怪~ 然后飞走 == 我明白 这是很欠打的文章 打我吧~

有时 我真的不知道该做什么 才能真的去忘了你 我明白是我太执着 但我别无选择 发现自己很傻 一个人守着那 已经不存在的承诺 是因为爱吗 我不知道 只想这样说 这样过 真的放手的人是你 不是我 我愿意为你留下 但是你亲手吧我赶走 我追了好远 你才告诉我我们不适合 叫我如何放手

握着你的手 有种莫名的冲动 爱了以后才发现 自己真的不懂 你需要的是什么 我不贪心 不自私 不想让任何人为我等候 不想找个借口 随便将你绑起来 手松开的时候 才发现你需要的 不是我

一个月前我问自已 想你吗 想，十分想 一个月后我重复的问 我回答了 一点点吧 为什么一份如此深厚的思念居照会被我遗忘了 是我不爱你了吗 淡了吗 我自己也不明白 答案从哪来~ 哀 悲哀~

今天正式工作第一天 很兴奋 好玩的是 我第一天就到麻坡了 累积了好多经验 好开心 虽然只买了两对 但我还是很开心 知道也了解了很多 顾客与社会的东西 有的友善 有的很直接的拒绝 但无所谓 知道了就好

今天开始了工作的训练 这是我第二份工作 我很期待 大家都对我很好 我很开心 今天户外活动的地点 在melaka baru 我很熟悉的地方 我们第一次见面的地方 当我经过了你最常去的咖啡店 我看见了你 我不知所措 心跳得好快 怕你看到我 怕你生气 你还是像从前那样 一样耀眼 一样好看 如此让我着迷 但我明白 你讨厌我 我不可以爱你

那年的夏天 我好象掉了什么 红通通的 好耀眼 跳得好快 没有雨 风很大 很凉爽 我眼直直望进了礼堂 你出现了 你好像把我掉的东西 捡走了 却没还给我 还把它给丢了 今年的夏天 我又找回了那 红通通的东西 但它跳得不快了 也不像去年那么温热了 我把它藏好了 等待着 看谁能让它恢复那般温热