姷瑾

it is a promise~ and this is the last time i turn back to talk about my past~ about my past~ it always make me hate myself~ seeing myself ~ so stupid ~ so lonely~ am i too proud or think a lot than other that having same age with me~ i too careful and walking so fast ~ cause i hate and scare to be hurt ~ and because of too fast ~ i lost the happiness that i should had for my passing age ~ my bro tell me although u loss somethings in the pass but i gain something now and future ~ ya~ just like wat he say i gain something~ i know the world more than other ~ i know what the real world look like~i got more expirence than other~ is not easy to be hurt in the future if u know a lot and think a lot~ face the world ~ face the truth~ this is how i live~ since the new journey start~ i wanna be a better girl ~ slow down my step~ enjoy everything i should have in the collage life~ may be i should think about boys ~ haha~ but not now ~ get a close buddy ~ ya i got a lot now~ study ...

Ok ~ now ~ no i should say ~~~~yes !!!!! finally , finally i finish my 1st sem exam ~ no eco ~ yes ~ i gonna enjoy my time with sleeping , books, drama in this few days~ for 3 weeks ~ i had let myself suffer for cold in library~ i scare cold ~ it make me feel lonely~ i hate to be alone ~ but i don have the choice ~ i don have the right to get my true love~ i donno y ~ i keep telling myself ~ u r just my friend~ but deep in my heart~ i so suffer~ seeing u and her ~ but wat to do~ i prefer to be silient ~ i don want to talk so much ~ so hurt~ so deep~ i tried to control myself from being near with u but it just can't ~ i will be very emotional after seeing somethings tat may have related with u~ i tried to be good attitude to u ~ but i fail to do~ i'm the one who start the quarrel again~ i don want it to happen but it just happen~ i just can't control myself from being angry when i noe u r hurting urself and wat the girl do~ i won't scold the girl ...

ok~ today i had go through the last two paper ~ marketing ~ is quiet a sad thing for me cause i had memorize all the things and the things that come out just half only but...........TT i stil hope can past la~ tomoro~ ok kitchen ~ i try my best to copy and paste all the things into my brain ~ i don wanna fail !!!! u noe ~ 1st time ~ 1st time i study so hard cause exam ~ i noe myself well i don like to study but i had force myself to go library to study 4 3 weeks start from 8.45am till evening !!! arghhh !!! now i'm so tired ~ i don feel to be the best but i wanna try my best~ and about my personal life....hmm.... almost the same makan and study~ but after exam i wanna enjoy !!!!!! sing k~ puchong trip~ movie~ !!! the conclusion~ i will try my best today ~~ study all the things~ it is not a love ~ it just a habit~ is just normal when u beside me~ as a friend~ i treat u just like friend and i love u cause u are my friend but not lover~ till now i just ...

This week exam d ~ ok ~ talking about exam~hmmm..... since when i become so hard working XDD i almost go library 4 study everyday > ya i love myself to be like ta tat means tat i had change to be better person XDD but the things b4 i start study ==||| i pokai liao== wat is pokai ? no money la~~ y ? ok ~ almost everyday i go eat dinner outside hostel ~ that not a main point~ the main point is where i go ~ ya ~ I go mamak , i go restaurant ~ i go western restaurant!!!! i feel to hang myself~ after tat i go pizza , i go mcd , i go sing k !!!!!! hahahaha!! tis is y i pokai XDD no funny == my last hundred ringgit ~ i gave out for Puchong trip d~ T___T but 4 all the monry i spend and the things i do ~ no regret ~ and i enjoy 4 tat~ spending all my time with all my tkd gangs ~ nice ~ tis is the things tat i never expirence b4 when i in secondary school~ sad ~ i donno y all the girls in my secondary school always don't like to call me out~ and they always go by themself ~...

8 of August ,i skip my marketing class 4 lecture cause teman some 1 emo and gonna study 4 exam ~ but the thing after i came back i play FB ~ i feel sorry 4 myself == i go 4 the HE lecture and i regret with my attendance == tourism + hotel management= 400++ students but just 1/10 0f students in the hall == after tat i go 4 the economic tutorial, b4 going i went back to hostel to change cause emo guy Eric call us to sport complex 4 gym ~ another regret attendance 4 me ~ when i reached the class, i shock with a empty class== i feel to jump down from the3rd floor of M block ~ 5pm i go gym to meet them~ but i get message from Chew Ling Eric had a replacement class and he will reach 6++~ wat happen to me T口T but nvr mind , we go in 1st b4 he come~ BenBen and his classmate joining us ~ i go cycle 4 20 min and walk + run 4 30 min~ i think tis is the 1st time i burn so many calories ~== after gym ~it look like going to rain ~ Wan Xuan join us 4 dinner~ we decide go GK 4 pizza ~...

7 of August ~ today i wake up at 11.00am and start writing my blog~down 1 la not now 1~ sit in front of my com i just study half of my introduction~ poor thing> but i still study ~ after 3pm i go lepak a while at Wangsa maju jusco~ when i in melaka , i also love to lepak but the things is i always lepak alone ~ i don't like lepak with all my girls because many things that i can't do when i lepak with them~ suffer u know ~~ i go wangsa to top up my phone credit and i go jj to walk a while and i bought a cup of coolblog ~ my favorite~ oreo peppermint milk tea~ i love milk tea so much >M i go by metro~and also came back with metro~actually i wanna get Rapid but the Rapid didn't come after i waited 4 half an hour == i hate u~ after i come back i straight open facebook~my habit~ and i found out somethings different about Eric ~he is so silent today~ if 1 day he didn't post many things that tell u tat somethings happen~ i not know him well but i still know his habit~ ya...

don't know why ? this few month i started to write my blog in english~ maybe i just wanna improve my english and get some attention from my friends~ not sure about tat~ talking about my blog i really hope to get some atttention from my friends , not all but some of my close friends ~ but the things that i dislike is after some of them read my blog they will laugh and talk about my blog ~ they will say i'm stupid == hey !! this is my blog if u wanna continue to read please shut up your stupid mouth b4 i stuck something inside~ This few day i having a bad mood and keep emoing == maybe some personal problem and some irritating person ~ talking about the person ~ arghhh ! i feel to bite her ! can u understand how irritating if the phone that u keep answer is call by a same person~ this problem strated when i gave her my number ~ i regret with tat == she keep calling me and call me and the reason she calling me always make me to hang up myself ~ ok ,not only her who wanna make me ha...

这星期 也许是我人生中 度过最长的一个星期 我的故事 你的故事 朋友 知己 我们似乎被夹在中间 爱你 也许让我变傻了 但我却有了目标 不再盲目 我愿意一辈子单身 也要守护着你 你的心 比我脆弱 爱 也许不能相比 但我不会输 我好喜欢你

我跟他 选择了对彼此坦白 我不知道我做得对不对 但起码 我们还是好朋友 我不知道 自己有多喜欢这男人 但我已包容他所有的缺点 也许是太了解 他宁愿不要我爱他 也不要我被他伤害 对他 也许就只能这样了 他可以同时喜欢两个人 我也认了 也许是注定 我也认了 如果能以朋友的身份 呆在他身边 要我单身一辈子 我愿意 你可以说我傻 但 你有想过吗？ 他是我的全部 在我生命里 他是不能少的角色 我好喜欢他

最近真的很纠结 才发现自己搞清楚了一件事 我原原本本喜欢的人 根本只有一个人 太清楚 每天都提他 每天都想他 但我很明白 我不应该喜欢他 不是因为他属于她的 而是他...... 无言 为什么我喜欢他 如果需要理由就不叫喜欢了吧 我只知道 在他面前 我可以很任性的做我自己 我可以做个真正的我 完全没伪装 呆在他身边我很舒服 可以很自由的骂粗话 他也不会介意 我和他是同一种人 我很明白 我太天真 我太了解他 他追过的每个女生 个个条件都比我好 我凭什么开口说我喜欢他 也许能以朋友的方式 就这样受在他身边 就够了 我不想破坏 我和他现在之间的友情 也许这感觉只能永远的 藏在心里 但无所谓 你幸福 你开心 我看见 什么都好 我会祝福 因为我喜欢你 我不想把这份珍贵的感觉 变成了别人的笑柄 甚至让你受到不必要的伤害 所以 我只想永远的 偷偷暗恋你