姷瑾

ok ~ tomoro i gonna have my introduction to information tecnology final exam but i still writing blog at here !!! how genius am  ! Am i crazy ? the reason i writing tis blog is i just finish reading a blog ~lol~ not  lol at all ~ am i crazy ? the way u treat me it still not cruel enough ? but why i still can telling myself to forgive u ~ and still hoping u will happy and get the right person in the future ? i think i really crazy , or i too kind 4 tat , i really blessing with my true heart ~ really ~ cause i really want u to be happy boy ~ maybe i should just call u man ~ i wasting my time reading his blog ............from the end till the starting ........ don't tell me u wanna block me again if u found out i read it ? i think u will , maybe ,tat the attitude u treat me ? and i donno y i read it ~ it just like reading a story book ~ hmm........... actually tis few day i think  a lot ~ i not mature enough ~ so be happy in ur future ~ tat wat i can say , d...

time just like flying and making joke with me ~ it had come to end of the sem again ~ when i close my eye , coming back from The Mines is just like just happen yesterday ~ such a sweet memory ~spending all the time with all my lovely tkd gangs ~ 4 this sem ~ hmmm........... happy , sad and angry , that we go through together ...... uncounted ~ snowflake ~ friendship ~ the things that always make our journey interesting ~ love ~ the sweetest thing but it also the things that make us suffer ~ family ~ 4 me only , giving me a warm hug but too noisy ~ looking back ~ wat had i done 4 tis whole sem ? damn idoit ~ spending money , playing , movie ,haha~ but most of the time , when the sem start ,i crying ~ wat had i learn from u ? yup ~ i learn how to cry , i learn wat is the feeling when u really love a person ~ don't talk about the sad things ~ most of the time , we go lepak together at times square and sungai wang ~ we go watch so many movie , like THE THING, ...

how long had i come to this college ? hmm ...... half year ~ tat mean tat i had know u almost half year ~ i had like u for half years ............. the time past so fast without our knowing ........ i trust myself and trust u , although so many things tat i see and hear from other , wheather bad or good ... i donno y , but i just follow wat my heart and mind say , trust no matter wat happen ....... wat people say , how they scold , how u hurt me , but i still belive , 1 day u may change , although i may not the 1 who let u change , although i not the type of girl u like , but i still waiting miracle to happen , although i noe it won't..... but since when , i start to doubt u , should i continue to trust , is not a good things to hear but should i ? cause i lost my confidence , i lost it , boy , sorry , i don't mean it ~  u may not mind the trust on me to u , but i mind on it , i donno y, i wanna care u , i wanna continue to like u but i lost the confidence , i not d...

sorry ~ since when tis word has coming out from me recently ? the reason i saying sorry , my friend that care 4 me always , i not tough enough to leave out everything yet ~ i still miss that stupid , i still feel uncomfortable when i lose connection wiyh him , i feel insecure when i didn't find out that he is safe .................. sorry , i deactive my account sudden just because he want me to dissappear from his life ....... cause i too mind what he saying , what ever the word he say to me is always in my mind ..... as conclusion , it not nice to say it out but the thing is i still stop myself from stalking him........... is a habit or wat ? i donno ~ if it really a habit i hape i can lose it ...... sometimes the world look perfect from outside but it started to be bad from deep ............ i deactive my account yesterday , the reason is i keep remember the word ........ step out from my life ..... the second time it let me feel like is such difficult to be a good f...

where should i start ? hmmm............ ok........... since i try to let down all the things ...... since i lost my tears to cry for you ....... since i lost a best friend like you........ i donno what the reason that make this happen between us but it can't turn back.... i had regret and apologize 4 so many time but it useless.... and wat the point i continue to do it when i found out that you didn't even care and treasure ..... the memory, i hope i had a delete button beside my mind so i can't straight delete it from my mind ..... i try to be strong , i try to do the best ...... i try to live without you...... i try to stop my tears.... and i did it ..... no tears for you , since last 3 weeks.... stop to miss you or care for you is the only things that i can't stop myself doing .... although it become lesser and lesser  , maybe once a week but you still feel that it is annoying ,k i will stop it ............. i care you as a friend , is thst a dif...

F lash back ~ half year ago ~ hahaha~ the 1st sight ~ The 1st time i step into the room , the 1st person tat i see is you ~ with a big eye ~ the moment i start to noe wat is fall in love with the 1st sight~ The second tat can let me cry ~ yea ~ u r the person ~ my tears become cheaper because of you ~ it come out so easy without control ~ what will you feel and think if you noe i learn how to cry since i love you ~ hahahahaha~ i damn stupid ~ The 1st peson tat let me feel wanna take care him for the whole of my life ~ the feeling that let me hug him tight and telling him i always right behind you is always in my heart ~ hope to hold you help you when you are in trouble , eventhough as a friend ~ is this love or just my feeling ? am i loving u from my true heart ? can anybody tell me wat is tis ? can anybody tell me can i continue doing like tis although i donno wat is tis ? maybe ..maybe ~

After 300 years and 1 month  ......................== finally i update my blog again ~ between tis 1 month , CK ? tell the truth , how many times u had cry ? donno ~ almost twice a week ~ hahaha~ FCUK my life 4 loving you ~ i didn't hate you but just can't accept the truth tat happen between both of us ~ when our friendship start to change this situation ? how many times i had tell you i demand nothing , just a friend ~ my favourite song for emo, just be friend and kiss the rain , i had repeat them for so many times in the middle of the night... my friend saw me crying , she say nothing , just hug me tightly ~ i ask her , should i just let our friendship just continue like tis ? should i continue loving him ? should i wait him ? althogh just half year , i had fall in love deep on him ........ she say  , i donno , depend on u~ 4 myself , i really donno ... i had lost the reason tat continue loving you ........... do i have the chance ? no ...... yesterday...