姷瑾

对你的了解 就像一种永无边界的折磨 你不了解的痛 越是了解越多的沉默 只因为太了解 就会知道如果你爱我 你从都不会这样做 我们的关系也不会流落到此地步 因为时间太长 我们都太懂彼此 才会幻想你的存在 你的温柔 你在我身后 你走进我生活 有时做人真的别太好 懂的也别太多 爱也别给的想象中的那么多 你懂吗？ 好不一定有回报........... tears , although you had disappear from my eye ~ but you still living in my heard ~ i still missing you, just sometimes.......

很爱过 很痛过 也许我的固执只有你们能明白 我的痛你们听得最多 我的故事只有你们能理解 离开是我最不愿意的 那种无奈那种伤感 流着泪 微笑着 我挥着手 说着再见 明年再见 那么多年 我以为我得到的很多 但才发现拥有你们这群朋友 才是真正的得到 不是我不珍惜从前的一切 只是终于发现我对他们来说我什么都不是 我以前到底是怎样活过来的 那种背叛我居然承受得到 这一年我没白过 即使读不完 但我认识了你们 我的人生在那瞬间填上的色彩 很难有人了解吧 一年前 带着害怕的心情 踏进这个社团前 我真的好怕 害怕受到伤害 害怕再次受伤 好多的害怕 我不敢靠近 又不想走得太远 害怕着多年陪伴我的寂寞再次出现 你们却像我最爱的糖 慢慢的把我引进去 让我忘记那种害怕 即使忘了刷牙 会蛀牙的害怕 即使牙蛀了 还是不怕死的把糖拿在手里 不愿放手 爱上就爱上了 不可能放手 你可以觉得我傻 但在这期间陪伴我度过的就是你们 我伤心沮丧时 我失望落寞时 好多话好多话想说 却又说不出口 很爱很爱你们 却被逼放手 好不想走 却什么都不能做 好想哭 却依然在微笑着说没事 看着你们我觉得我好像拥有了全世界 谢谢你们 让我生活充满希望 很爱很爱你们

走在街上 想起我和你停留过的街角 心里那暖流在蔓延着......... 听着某首歌曲 怀念我两坐在一起 两人手里的mp3 耳机在耳边 听着同一个电台 看着对方的眼 微笑........... 看着某个电影 想起我们并肩坐在一起 坐在电影院里 看着同一部电影 讨论着一样的剧情.......... 吃饭时 想着 你是否还是常常一个人吃饭 寂不寂寞 需不需要我来陪 想你 真的想你 爱你 真的爱你

折磨，折磨，一切都是折磨............. 摧残着我的灵魂，腐蚀着我的意志............. 他们的控制，他们的嘲讽.........受伤的我，懦弱的我......... 你的香，你的脸庞.............无奈的我，自虐的我............ 怎样才能逃脱你们的控制，你们的魔掌? 怎样才能忘记你的香，你的脸庞? 忘不了，忘不了你们的责骂，诅咒，责打...... 忘不了，忘不了雨中的我们，拥抱的时刻，甜蜜的对话...... 放空，一直放空.................. 我受够......................... 放过我好吗？？ 我的努力，即使再怎么努力就是空……………… 我的爱，再怎么痴心，只是一片狼狈............ 仿佛在没有尽头的黑暗奔跑……………… 你不懂，你们更不懂.......................... 我是谁，我是谁，你们的娃娃，你的备胎？ 那样的黑，那样的痛，你们懂吗？你了解吗？ 我不想离开的理由，我留下的理由，你们和你懂吗？ 我恨你们，我爱你？ 你懂吗？

time pass  without knowing again, 19 years old another starting for me ~ the short semester going to the end again ~ this is the 3rd semester in TARC ~ so many memory had build with all my friends ~ Tkd gangs ，H10 ~ hmm.................... fall in love with taekwondo ~ keep going training >< my result ............... tat the bad thing ~ 4/6 =w= wat is that ? 6 subject i had fail 4.............T^T so this sem i spend many time in study cut down the time going makan with my gangs at TBR or GK~ sigh ~ really miss the time when we go out together ~ do u miss it ? accounting , Introduction to hospitality , IT and food preparation 1 ~ i gonna resit this~ this sem sub ~ F&B bar beverage , Tamadun and French 2~ for me the most scary 1 is french ~ no confidence at all～ Talking about you ............. You live happily , we live happily without each other ~ maybe u were right i should just let go ~ right now fighting for my future , life is beautiful ~ your girl ~ ...

Since CNY start , life just like boring and messing up~ you walk in to my life and you just walk out without my knowing after u left a scars~ i though u will be the 1st person tat will company me this year 4 the valentime ~ look like i had over thinking ~ hahahahaha ~ how the god giving me this type of joke ~ i can't stand on it ~ some1 tell me tat , how bad are you but still a person love you , how good are you still a person hate u ~ i just realize tat~ 1 month in melaka ~ it giving me time , keep working , keep thinking , stop missing you 4 tis whole month ~ even though ur birthday , tat time , the last message 4 u ~ tat is a promise 4 myself , the final tender tat i give u , no matter wat u reply ,  wat u do , no regret ~ but after sending out i cry , 4 the whole nite , till the second day ~ i donno y i crying , but i had cry for few day every nite ~ after tat just like nothing happen , u just disappear from my life ~ my mind just blank out ~ meeting friends con...

after genting trip ............ CNY coming ~ so i need to went back to my hometown , melaka again ........... u can say tat i'm cruel enough , but really i hate my home ~ but i try to accept it ~ since they r the 1 who big me up ~ but since i'm small the still hope to run away from tis house ~ why ? hahaha ~ i hate it ~ calling u is just 4 work ~ study , no friends and entertainment ~ about study ya ~ u noe wat ? i not hating study but just how i read or study , the word in the book still can't copy in to my brain ~ i damn stupid i noe ~ my dad and mum is good in their study but sorry i not ~ i noe wat i doing , i try to study hard just look like no1 can see it ~ y other people going back their hometown is so happy but not me ? i hope i can be happy when i can spent my time with my family , but y i can't ? i just hope to be normal ~ my dad always say don't compare urself with other , i'm not comparing but just demand something tat is basic from the n...